When I Was Hooked on the H
I'm finally prepared to admit it. One year ago, I was hooked on the H.
Not a day went by that I didn't need my fix of this special brand of H—the LH.
I had to have it. I set up my life to get three doses a day: two in the morning, one at supper. 'Cause one thing I learned was, you can never get enough LH.
In case you're wondering what the hell LH is, it's Little House on the Prairie. Now don't laugh. That show had me hooked, I tell you. It started back when I was a kid in the late 70s and early 80s. Unbeknownst to anyone except my sisters, I watched reruns of LH between episodes of CHiPs and Magnum, P.I., and I never missed a show.
Charles and Caroline Ingalls. Or, just Pa & Ma to me, thank you.
All last winter, Alexas was unemployed, which honestly was a lot of fun. Every morning we'd rise at eight o'clock, or before dawn if there had been a storm during the night, and go out and shovel. (For Alexas, a California gal, shoveling snow was a novelty, and one I was glad to share with her.) Then we'd have breakfast— johnnycakes with maple syrup—and watch LH.
I'm something of a lay expert on LH, and I'll admit, I did my fair share of showing off to Alexas. At the outset of each episode, I would recite the plot—often within one minute. Mind you, I hadn't seen this show at all for 20-plus years.
I soon had my bride hooked on LH to the point that, if the evening cycle of episodes ended on a cliffhanger, she couldn't sleep that night. She had to know what happens. Invariably that's when the laptop came out and Alexas started trolling the internet for all things LH. Soon she longed for the meatier, conflict-laden episodes, just like her husband.
"Toad..." she'd say, using her pet name for me, "when does Mary go blind...?"
"Soon, Frog," I'd say. "Soon."
As chance would have it, we had just missed the "Mary goes blind" episodes and had to catch them when the cycle started over again. I know what you're thinking: this is a lot like waiting for a comet to return. But it did, and after Part II of that episode, Alexas was content.
"That was awesome," she said.
"See?" I said.
I suppose you're wondering why I love LH so. Well, let me count the ways.
First, there's Pa, played by Michael Landon. As Alexas said, "He's SuperDad." That's right, Alexas, he's SuperDad. Pa works unbelievably hard to provide for his girls, once traveling 100 miles to find work. He's strong physically, mentally and spiritually. The guy can do anything—build a house, make furniture, transport blasting oil, split rock, raise a crop, and lead the church. But I think the facet of Pa's character that I admire the most is his Job-like faith. Despite all of the terrible things that happen to him, he never loses his faith, and somehow, everything turns out right in the end.
Then there's Ma, or SuperMa. Caroline Ingalls. Always fresh-faced and lovely, Ma bakes the best pies, sells the best eggs, makes the best dresses. And of course let's not forget the darling of LH, Laura. In the course of 203 episodes (not including the TV movies), we see "Half-Pint" evolve from a spunky tomboy into a feisty redheaded woman, all the while torturing squeaky Willie Olson and exacting revenge on evil Nellie.
But I think it's their trials that hooked me the most. The characters are consistently placed in tough situations and must perform at their highest capacities to overcome obstacles. In short, there's conflict in every show, and often high-stakes conflict. Will they lose the farm? Will Mary survive her operation? Will teenage Albert and Sylvia run away together? Will the children die in the blizzard?
I realize that many of the above conflicts have appeared in soap operas as well, but LH was much better than any soap opera. The writing was better, the acting was better, and the direction was infinitely better.
Landon wrote and directed most of the episodes, and the show bears his mark. As you probably know, before LH he was a TV icon for years on Bonanza, and he brought a lot of the Western sensibility to LH. In my opinion every LH show that he directed feels like a mini-movie. There is a great sense of story, and every scene heeds the advice of screenwriter William Goldman, who admonished creators to, "get into scenes as late as possible." In other words, cut all of the warm-up crap and just show the heart of the conflict.
Another thing that made the series great was something that I think can easily be overlooked, and that's Landon's use of establishing shots. This might sound trivial, but somehow over the course of 200+ episodes, Landon succeeded in never duplicating the same establishing shot twice. If you watch every episode closely, you'll see that he always shot from a slightly different angle or vantage point. The result is a tacit sense that no matter how well you think you know Walnut Grove, there are surprises around every corner.
The Little House collection by Laura Ingalls Wilder.
Perfect for 10-year-old girls or strong, sensitive
men in their 30s who long for simpler times.
Once Alexas realized how juiced I was for LH, she asked if I'd read the books by the real Laura Ingalls Wilder. I hadn't. In fact, the only children's books I remember reading were The Little Engine that Could and The Pokey Little Puppy. So, for my birthday last February, Alexas bought me the boxed set of the books that started it all.
For a week, I was enthralled. There were dozens of adventures that didn't appear in the TV version. My favorite of the set, without question, is The Long Winter. As the snow piled up outside, I read about the trials that Laura and her family faced in the Dakota Territory. Here's the jacket copy:
The first terrible storm comes to the barren prairie in October. Then it snows almost without stopping until April. Snow has reached the rooftops, and no trains can get through with food or coal. The people of De Smet are starving, including Laura's family....
And I thought I knew hardship, having to shovel my neighbor's walk and cut back on eating out. Meanwhile, during The Long Winter, Laura's family had to
- Braid hay together until their hands bled to make firewood.
- Grind up seed wheat in a coffee grinder to make flavorless brown bread.
- Sleep in sub-zero cold during the night to conserve fuel.
- Tie a rope to themselves when they went out to the barn so they wouldn't get swallowed up by the latest blizzard.
- And much, much more!
So there you are—the winter I was hooked on LH. But I'm not ashamed. Really I'm not. I think LH was a great show, and we could do with a new family program with actual story and morals behind it. Michael Landon created something special that has stood the test of time, and will continue to.